My grocery list has changed as I've had more birthdays what's up with that?

If I live until tomorrow, I will be 57 years old. I'm very grateful I've made it this long, but things are not the same with me since I was 21. My grocery list has drastically changed! Since I am a couponer, I can't believe how excited I get when stool softener is on sale! I will go through the roof if I see enemas buy one get one free! And how nice it is that they have flavored laxatives. I now scan the shelves for the best buy on vitamins that will give me the most "energy".I'm even giving my husband Testesterone shots, for guess what? Energy!!!! I can't believe I actually bought a tube of gel that helps "age spots" for my hands, moisture cream for my wrinkled face, I placed it beside my great buy on Advil and Aleve. What has happened to me? In my Bible reading this morning, I was really trying to allow God to speak to me, but I was soooo sleepy. So, what did I read? ".....Don't be ignorant of those who fall asleep....." I couldn't help but laugh, even though, I know He was speaking of those who have died. But when I'm sitting on the couch, with crocheting in hand, and the next thing I remember my husband is shaking me, saying, "honey, you wanna go to bed?" I'm slumped down, my yarn still in my lap and I look at the clock and notice an hour and a half has passed. All you young ones can laugh yourself silly over this, but your day is coming! I just never thought it would happen to me. Well, I've got to get ready for work, now where did I put the Geritol?
Love, Luck, and Laughter,
Paula the hillbilly